


These roads that take me home

by firekeeper_of_astora



Category: Bunheads
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Future Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 18:40:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/852769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firekeeper_of_astora/pseuds/firekeeper_of_astora
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the end, she had to face reality. Her parents were leaving.  She had no job. She couldn’t afford an apartment, couldn’t afford the cost of living, and her mother was not in the mood to as she put it, “deal with any of her emo teenage angst rebellion crap.” </p>
<p>So she left with her mother, leaving her immature notions and dreams behind in Paradise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	These roads that take me home

**Author's Note:**

> It’s been many years since I’ve done any creative writing aside from personal statements for school applications. My muse wouldn’t stop hitting me until I dropped my books and wrote this. So I apologize in advance if my grammar or what-nots are off. I tried. Thanks.

She dreams of a life that never happened. In it she’s 16 again. She’s in an apron, moving around a kitchen with purpose, surrounded by friends from another life. She walks through an apartment with pink walls, and comes across a room with a barre in it. This must be her bedroom. How she knows this, she doesn’t know. Tentatively, she places her hand on the barre and finds her younger self smiling back at her in a mirror.

Sasha closes her eyes to blink.

When she opens them, it’s dark outside. David’s arm is wrapped around her waist. It feels heavy. Too heavy. She wakes him gently. It’s been a rough day for them both. It’s been nothing but two all-nighters and then the craziest of two finals straight from med school hell. 

She stretches in bed and considers the dream. It would seem that the less sleep she gets, the more surreal and fantastical her dreams become. She hasn’t touched a barre, hasn’t moved around a studio in years. She let go of all of that ever since she left Paradise in the wake of her parents’ divorce. She remembers that she had wanted to stay. Paradise had been her home. Her friends had been there. Ballet had been there. Everything had been there.

In the end, she had to face reality. Her parents were leaving.  She had no job. She couldn’t afford an apartment, couldn’t afford the cost of living, and her mother was in no mood to as she put it, “deal with any of her emo teenage angst rebellion crap.”

So she left with her mother, leaving her immature notions and dreams behind in Paradise.

 

“You okay?” David’s voice.

She looks up. He’s out of bed already, slipping into his jeans. He turns to look at her with concern in his eyes.

He really worries too much. A bit _too_ much for her taste.

She gives him a smile and nods her head. “Just give me a minute,” she says.

 

Sasha’s been living somewhere around the area for school, but she’s avoided Paradise, hasn’t kept in contact with anyone there. She used to get messages from them all, and she would reply in kind. After awhile, she stopped replying and the influx of messages slowed, but never quite stopped. She decided to get a new account and never went back to her old one.

 

They meet up with a bunch of people from their class at a local bar. David goes off to get first round. She greets those familiar to her with smiles. Everyone’s eyes are bright. She notices the shadows under the eyes of some, and the barely-in-my body look some have, but that’s what tonight is for.

When David comes back and hands her a glass, she feels her body light up, anticipating the euphoria.

After the fifth or sixth or seventh drink this hour or maybe it’s the second hour or whatever, she makes her way over to the bar and asks for a double with a smile and twinkle in her eye. She’s barely there.

Across from her, she sees a curtain of hair that seems somewhat familiar. She waits for the woman to look up. When she does, she can feel her own eyes widen. The woman looks at her, eyebrow raised, eyes unrecognizing and looks back down to her drink.

She moves around the table, drink in hand with her heart skipping around in her chest. Her eyes never leave the woman. It might be cheesy, but she swears she can smell the scent of something acquainted from long ago. It should be more difficult than it is, but her legs keep moving.  Actually, she’s finding it really easy to walk up to the woman, grin and say-

“Hi.”

The woman turns to her with a frown and looks like she’s thinking hard for a second before her face changes and she smiles in recognition.

“Hey, kid.” Michelle looks her up and down. “Wow, you’ve really grown…in and all.”

She can’t help herself. “Like what you see?” She gestures clumsily at herself and out of her glass goes part of her drink.

The woman quirks an eyebrow. “Haven’t seem to grow up, apparently. I think you’ve had enough to drink.” Michelle makes a grab for the glass, but she manages to snatch her hand away and downs the rest of the drink.

“It’s OK, mom,” She teases. “Look! I finished and got all my nutrients.” She mockingly flips the glass over to show it’s empty.

Melting ice falls straight out of the glass.

“Definitely had enough to drink.”

Michelle takes the empty glass out of her hand and places it on the counter, giving the bartender an apologetic look.

“Alright, who are you here with? Where’s your party?”

Sasha looks around for David, her eyes blurry. She gives up and points in some direction. 

Michelle follows the direction of her pointing and squints. “Nope. I don’t think you’re with Old Mr. Harley’s Angel over there.”

She points in another direction.

Michelle cringes.

Sasha laughs.

“Alrighty then. Time to take you home.”

“I thought you’d never ask,” she says and gives her a wink.

Michelle sighs and without a thought, grabs her hand.

She knows it's cheesy, but Sasha hasn’t felt more alive in forever.

“Moves fast, this one. You gonna put a ring on it?”

Michelle makes damn sure she downs her own glass, fixes her dress and then drags the girl away.

 

Sasha looks out the side of the car. Watches the blur of the dark trees and buildings pass by. The cooler air of the coast feels soothing.  Tears would probably be spilling out if she was a sad drunk.

She’s not a sad drunk.

Out of the corner of her eye she sees Michelle briefly glance over, about to say something. And then her eyes are back on the road, mouth closed.

  

From where they walk, she can see the outside of the studio. It’s dark inside. In her mind, she sees where the barres are laid out, and the mirrors and the wooden floor. She sees faceless ballerinas, moving in and out together, in sync. Michelle takes her hand again and guides her towards the guest house.

And then they’re inside.

The first thing she notices is that almost everything looks exactly the same. The tub is still there, out in the open. There’s still piles of crap everywhere.

“Nice upgrade.”

Michelle gives her a grandiose bow and it’s almost like old times.

 

“So, medical school, huh?” Michelle asks. They’re sitting on that old couch Sasha used to sleep on.

Sasha turns to look at her surprised. “How’d you figure that out?” Then, she gives her a devious grin. “Have you been stalking me? Is that why you were there tonight in a sexy dress…spying on me?”

Michelle frowns for a second and then points at her chest. “Dr. Observant. Your sweatshirt, Dr. Observant.”

Michelle gets up to go change out of her dress.

After awhile, Sasha’s eyelids start to feel heavy. She lets them slide over her eyes as her back sinks into the couch. It should be weird. They haven’t spoken in forever. They should be as awkward as a pair of strangers, but it feels easy between them.

She’s startled awake when a great big wad of blanket comes into contact with her head.

She looks up to see Michelle give her a mock apologetic grin. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist,” she says.

As she waits for Michelle to get to the light switch, her heart thuds rapidly in her chest. She runs over to the bed and slips under the covers.

“What the…“ Michelle is at the bed looking down at her. “Kid, you’re not 16 anymore.”

She gives her the best Bambi eyes she can muster.

The woman sighs and throws up her hands in the familiar way she always throws up her hands, and then she gets in, back facing her.

Sasha smiles.

She slings her arm around the woman’s middle. She can feel Michelle tense, then relax into the hold.

Sasha feels so alive, she thinks she’s getting an arrhythmia. She figures if she’s going to go into cardiac arrest and die soon, she might as well do this one last thing. So she places a kiss on the back of the woman’s neck. She’s rewarded with a small gasp.

Michelle turns to face her in the dark. Her eyes asks her questions.

Sasha stares back at her.

“I’m not 16 anymore,” Sasha finally says.

 


End file.
